Hoops-Move Stops Hotel Staff From Starving Me

Some idiot forgot to include 3 words in a recent email...

Now I have to write you this email... while on vacation.

There's a terrific story that assaulted my ears today.

We were in a hotel, a Comfort Suites that has seen better days. I had just gotten my heart rate down from normal (it's a low blood pressure joke).

You see, I was the last person through the continental breakfast this morning.

I had to stand in a basketball defensive position with my arms stretched out just to keep the hotel staff from unplugging the toaster with my toast in it.

They were very prompt.

And breakfast ended at 9.

You're baking a waffle? Quick, empty the minifridge of butter.

Toasting a bagel? That's just enough time to drain the juice machine.

And today's writing suggestion...

is all about random acts of cliffhanging. I like to call them

Curiosity Traps

Don't worry. I'm going to write about the blaring fire alarm that made us snatch up SleepyLegs 'Licity, cover her ears, and flee the premises some other time.

That's one example of adding curiosity traps to your writing.

You tease a story or secret or solution at the beginning of your article (or in this case a series of letters).

Then you reveal the answer towards the end (in this example, the end of the series).

This way you trap your reader's curiosity and keep them reading. That's what's in it for you.

What's in it for your manipulated reader?

They get to enjoy the suspense of a good mystery. At least if you build suspense in an artful way instead of going on a tangent and never getting back to the story like I did at the start of this letter.

Ducks say "Hi."

I left them with a pile of food and a full kiddie pool of water. They are inside a fence at home. We are at a hotel.

So I have no idea what the ducks are saying. Or if they are saying anything.... I hope they are okay.

— DadFace

P.S. - Oh, the 3 words that idiot forgot to include in my welcome email? (Yes, the idiot was me.)

The 3 words I left out were "starting in January." Don't worry if you have no idea what I'm talking about. Go back and reread the first sentence of this letter.

Don't worry if you didn't get my welcome email.

I think a lot of you subscribed so quickly the email newsletter service hadn't even finished verifying that I'm a human. So the email machine wasn't even sending emails yet.

Verification took several weeks. I think it was because they were afraid the newsletter was written by AI. But it had nothing to do with the name "Dear DadFace."

The long and short of it is you're not even supposed to be getting this email. I was supposed to have until January to send you another letter.

You're welcome.

I was also supposed to have 40 newsletter issues written already... but that's another story for another time...

Maybe a time dedicated to discussing New Year's resolutions...