DadFace Day

I tried to come up with an original term for fatherhood I could trademark.

I got “DadFaceHood.”

So, what do you think? I could print it on a mug, or a t-shirt, or a hoodie…

“Honey, here’s your Father’s Day present!”

“Oh wow… This way I won’t get cold when you turn the air to the same setting they use to transport the Schwan’s food.”

“Yes! It’s the latest in hooded sweat wear — a DadFaceHood. When it gets really cold or COVID comes back in style it has a bonus hood to cover your face.”

I know I was supposed to be writing “7 Years with the Wrong Woman.” It’s a letter all about our anniversary and what a great lady MomBrain is. And how I went to Trader Joe’s 3 times in the same day.

(I was tempted to rewrite that last sentence to explain better, but then you wouldn’t need to read the soon-to-be-released letter.)

I was dutifully writing 7 Years with the Wrong Woman when I realized that technically I have all year to finish it.

Instead, I started daydreaming about the time we had a little baby girl and then another one and another… I guess Father’s Day can do that.

Fatherhood vs. DadFacehood

Right now the oldest, the Amazing Jillian is asking me to “hold her feet” as she dangles off the the couch headfirst.

Last week I took her to IHOP and she ordered a French Toast. When the food arrived — a tower of thick toast topped with strawberries, bananas, and whipped cream — her eyes lit up. Every other bite she’d stop and say “this is the best date ever!”

It sounds good, another moment in DadFace’s highlight reel. But about 5 minutes in, I ran out of things to say — to my own daughter.

I guess it’s the inevitable collision between the imaginings of a DadFace and the real world implementation of a father.

Like New Year’s, Father’s Day inevitably leads to reflection and evaluation. And for me, the first thought isn’t all that different from one the prophet Elijah had.

Of course it’s overdramatic. And sometimes writing is the same way. Someone’s writes better than you, and finishes more projects too.

DadFace Directive:

If at first you have a discouraging thought, follow Elijah’s lead (see 1 Kings, Chapter 19):

1. Eat something.

2. Rest.

3. Listen to God’s voice aka read God’s word aka the Bible. (The book of Psalms in particular details the constant adversity and uphill climb David endured before becoming the King of all Israel, which is strangely comforting.)

4. Remember there are a tons of other people going through the same thing. In Elijah’s case, 7,000 people, and get thought he was the only one.

5. Realize Elijah thought he wasn’t better than his fathers when in reality he was one of the greatest prophets of all time.

But I must be doing something right because on the way to church this morning, as we drove through the countryside where I often point out horses, cows, and the occasional llama, the Extraordinary Ellia asked, “Are horses real?”

Happy Father’s Day!

— DadFace

P.S. — We have a new arrival. MomBrain rescued a kitten from a culvert. Okay, she may have stolen it from the neighbors. What’s its name, you ask? Good question. It’s Monte Carlo at the moment… You’ll have to tune in next time to see if any of this is true…